Dear Reagan

This is a letter i wrote to our sweet babe a month before my due date. My sweet Reagan, we are exactly one month from the day we will hopefully see your sweet little face. As the day quickly approaches i wanted to share a few things that I've been praying about. I pray that you will know how very special you are to me. May you never forget that you are the most important thing in our life and no matter how much I mess up as a mother  and how discouraged you become with me..I promise to always try to be my best for you.  I pray that you will always strive to grow in your relationship with Christ- that you will allow him to constantly mold and shape you into a godly woman. I pray that you will be joyful. May you always be thankful for each new day and know that every new day is a gift from our Lord. May you laugh, dance and never be afraid to be yourself! I pray that you will have a big heart that loves and shows the love of Christ to everyone( even the ones that you don't feel deserve it..remember we don't deserve the love our Jesus gives to us)  I pray that as you grow..you will strive to be a lady. May you always keep your legs crossed, your cleavage covered , your clothes breathable and your mouth clean ( otherwise, I will wash it out with soap) I pray that you will use all your gifts that God has given to you for His glory. I pray that whatever struggles you go through in your life, may you know that God will never leave your side and lean on Him for your strenghtb. May you learn from each struggle and become a stronger woman because of it. I pray that when the time comes for you to be interested in boys..that you will choose a man like your father. Reagan, , your daddy is the most amazing man. He loves me so much and it would fell my heart with joy to know that you have found a man that loves you and cherishes you just like your father loves and cherishes me. I love you sweet girl and I can't wait to finally meet you. With all my love- mommy Sent from my iPhone

Motherhood

I know this blog has been very neglected,but to be honest with you.. I'm more of a reader than I am a writer. I actually despise writing very much. My husband is the talented writer in our family. Since becoming a mother I have been experiencing so many emotions and thoughts..that I thought perhaps writing would make me feel better. So, this post is for me. It's probably going to be very lengthy and random.
          1. My husband and I made a really cute baby..well, actually God made all cute babies and he made ours extra cute. She is the apple of our eye and we love her more than anything in this world.
          2. Motherhood is the hardest thing I have EVER done..harder than labor ( that was the easy part-and I had Reagan naturally!)
         3. I was  home with "R" 9 weeks and then went back to work. I still cry every morning on my way to work.  I pray that the Lord will give me strength to get through the day..I know that without Him I wouldn't be able to get through it. People would tell me "oh, by 2 weeks into it you'll be use to" well, guess what...that was the biggest fat lie I have ever heard. It has NEVER, nor will it ever be easy to leave my baby girl. I have to take it one day at a time. I went through a period where I was so frustrated with God. I always wanted to be a mother..a stay at home mother. and Reagan was not planned..she was our sweet surprise. So, when it was time to talk about how long I would stay home with our sweet babe.. I expected God to allow me to stay home..since it was He who planned my pregnancy. I prayed and pleaded with God to please allow me to be there for my baby girl. But for now, it's God's plan for me to go back to work. A while back I had a friend at work tell me that she works because she wants to not because she needs to. She told me " I just need a break from my kids". Really?! are you serious?? I praise and thank Jesus everyday for the time he has given me with my baby girl. I would forever be grateful and thankful if I ever get the chance to stay home. Going back to work and doing my job is so much easier than what I did for nine weeks, but if I could stay home with her I would have my dream job. I don't mean to complain. I know I need to be more grateful for all the blessings the Lord has poured into my life. I'm thankful that Lord gave me this precious gift. Motherhood has truly been the most difficult, but amazing journey!  
       

Life is full of surprises

July 4, 2011 is a day I don't think my husband and I will EVER forget. We had a plan..It was called the " Five year plan" that got cut down to the " Three year plan" after my niece was born :). Our life forever changed on that day. It was the day we found out that we were going to welcome a little baby into this world. I hope that I will never forget the emotions I felt on that day. I woke up that day feeling a little "off". Something just didn't feel right. Foods that were once my favorite... suddenly became my enemy. I remember going to our family cook out that day and thinking " if I look at a hot dog.. I will throw up" I think for the first time in my life I was the first one done with their food. I'm sure the few chips and the half eaten burger patty had something to do with it. After I got home...I got sick..I mean reallly sick. I called my husband and told him what happened and the first words out of his mouth were " I'm stopping to get a pregnancy test..I bet your pregnant". Me? pregnant?? um...NO! I'm on birth control honey! But he did it anyway. He got home around 11pm. I took the box from him, ran up stairs, took the test and set it on the counter. I finished washing my hands, grabbed the test , quickly glanced at it and was ready toss it in the trash when a big fat PREGNANT popped up! I just looked at it and looked at it and thought maybe it was broken. I mean..that happens right?? My husband was taking our dog outside and I knew he was getting ready to walk inside. I always envisioned telling him in a really cute and memorable way, instead I ran down the stairs with the test in hand and said " we're going to have a baby" and then burst into tears. I will never forget his face..it was a look such excitement. I knew he was always wanted to be a father and now he is!!We did'nt get much sleep that night. Instead we laid in bed praying, and crying and thanking our Lord for this little surprise miracle that he gave to us. It's a day I will forever treasure.

Leaving a Legacy

This past week I attended the funeral of one of my best friend's grandmother. As I was sitting there listening to all that was being said about this sweet lady, I thought to myself - What will people say about me at my funeral? What kind of impact have I left in this world? What will people remember me as? This grandmother was known as the godliest woman in her family...WOW! What a title to have!!
As I think about the legacy I aspire to leave, I am quickly reminded of 2 Timothy 4:7 “I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith.” I want the legacy that I leave to label me as faithful...a faithful servant of my Jesus. I long for the day where I hear Jesus say, “Well done, good and faithful servant.”

Things I'm loving right now.

• I'm loving my hubby: I love that he loves the Lord. I love his smile. I love his teeth ( they are pretty much perfect) I love that he is the most sacrificial man I know. I love that he is a genius and extremely smart. I love that his family always comes first. I love how romantic he is. He is my everything.

• I'm loving my dog: Lexi and I have come a long way. You see, I really was not fond of her at first. She destroyed so many things in our house that I have lost track. I have had a love/hate relationship with her ever since we got her, but it has slowly turned to love . She is always there for me. Whenever I'm lonely, she's there. When I come home and have had a terrible day at work, she's there. She's is never in a bad mood and she never gets tried of listening to me. I never thought I can have so much love for an animal, But I do. She really is part of our family, and we love her dearly!


• I'm loving that in less than 10 days I will be an aunt! My SIL is due with a precious girl! This is the first grand baby on both sides. So we are all so thrilled and can't wait! I am SOO excited!!
• I'm loving that fall is just around the corner. I love everything about this season. Leaves changing colors, the yummy scent of pumpkin bread, and Yankee Candle's sparkling cinnamon.
• I'm loving this blog fulmerstory.blogspot.com . Their story brings tears to my eyes! Our God is so amazing and works in wonderous ways.

What Are You Loving??

Finally!

After a few years of blog stocking..I finally got the courage to start my own blog. Before I go any further I have to warn you all, If you like to be grammatically correct, this blog is NOT for you :) I will write like I speak and I know I'm not suppose to do that. :) My name is Yelena and I am married to my prince charming. He is everything I ever wanted in a man and sooo much more! Together we have a cute little puppy, Lexi. She is a wild child and daddy's princess! I was born in Ukraine and speak Russian and Ukrainian fluently. My faith is extremely important to me. My main desire is to live a Christ-filled life, falling more in love with my Jesus every day and allowing Him to form me into the woman, daughter, wife, and some day mother that he desires for me to be. I'm excited to get connected to the blog world. I don't expect this blog to be as good as some of my favorites, but I hope you all will enjoy it!